Vagabond: You Don't Know The Half Of It

August 18th, 200911:17 am @ tom arkell

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After accidentally forming last year in a Kent studio, multi-cultural quintet Vagabond release their highly anticipated debut album You Don’t Know The Half Of It. The sad thing is they’re actually right – we don’t know the half of it. And after suffering 40 minutes of this, if the truth be told we don’t really want to.

Overseen by Brian Higgins, the brains behind pop production powerhouse Xenomania, (where success certainly cannot be denied as every male’s guilty pleasure Girls Aloud have achieved far more than anybody could have ever expected with very little talent) one could have expected an assault on the charts. But the fact that they sound like an poor man’s Toploader, if that’s possible, the likelihood of that is very slim – as the tolerable Don’t Wanna Run No More could be (hopefully) the first and last thing you may hear from this musical mishap unless you’re an avid listener to daytime Radio 2.

Hovering loosely between genres from the slightly detached attempt at funk in I Know A Girl (where, for a brief moment, we forgive Jamie Cullum for what he put us through), to a cringing electro pop in I’ve Been Wanting You and Clouded Circus with possibly the worst drum beats since Jason Donovan brought us Too Many Broken Hearts. A very faint glimmer of light reappears with I Said Hello and Smile Of Mona Lisa, if nothing else they are a little easier on the ear and prove that Alex Vargas can actually hold a note.

Sadly there is no identity. Are they rock? Are they soul? Are they Europop? Do they actually know what they are? I’m really not sure. Mixing this with a lack of imagination, weak song writing and digitally enhanced rhythms can only remind us of the tragic late 80′s, early 90′s demise where the invasion of Stock, Aitken and Waterman ruined half a decade of music. We cant afford to take that chance again.

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